Little behaviours of our partner that irritates

This should be a great topic for discussion. I had a good reunion with my old school girls. For some of them, it has been a good 30 years since I've seen them again after the day we said good bye from that Form 5 years.

And as usual the topics got to our partners. The men in our life that becomes irritating after x number of years since we married. We are all from Convent Kajang, so obviously we only talked about the men and their habits. So guys, if you felt that it's not fair to complain only of men, you can give your point of view of your other half too.



Let's start with a simple habit such as using a toothpaste. Here's some of the funny remarks that were bought up. We certainly had a good life on how this small little habits had created so many arguments and quarrels.

Chooi said, "He always leaves the cap opened, and it irritates the hell out of me. Initially I told him to cap it back, then it progressed to me screaming my head off. Finally, I gave up. I just squeeze out the toothpaste for him and leave it for him if am up earlier and which is often." Wow, I have yet to do that although my love also did that. Loves to just uncapped and leave the cap aside. I told Chooi, "he's certainly the pampered one!"

Meng injected, "Me, I am the one that uses the toothpaste up to the last tiny bit. He used to just throw it away when there's still so much to be squeezed out. So he's the one that gets to use the new toothpaste first." Talk about lady's first!

"I am the lucky one", said Hoon. "My man's the one that hold's the purse string which is good. I am the spendthrift. Whilst he's the stingy partner in our relationship. He will cut out the toothpaste and use it until it's so clean that you would think he licked them clean." We were all laughing. "Seriously, initially I just am amazed and I will watched how he gets it so clean. He will take a scissor, cuts the bottom and use it till there's nothing to squeeze any more. Then he'll cut it open and uses his finger to scrapped every bit of it." Oh my God, I can't believe it. "Did he came from a poor family?" I asked Hoon. "No, their's was average family, but I think he follows after his mum."

And then that's Fung. "He will squeeze very nicely from the bottom. And I just squeeze it out at any part of the tube depending on which part I picked it up. It used to drives him crazy as each night or morning he'll be tidying it up by squeezing it all from the bottom to the top so that the tube looks neat! Initially I can't understand why he needs to do it. I told him there's better things to do then spend that 5 minutes squeezing it so that it's looks 'nicely used'! We had so many fights and quarrels not only of this but many other things too. He's just so tidy and so so neat. I think he got the message finally after 25 years, that am not going to change."

Chin said, "My's a messy fellow. He leaves it just at the sink, cap opened, with the sink wet, drops of that toothpaste form dripping all over the sink. It starts my day in a real bad mood when I see that! Why can't he cleans up, just take a tissue and wipe it, knowing that it upsets me. I taught he said he'll do anything for me when we were courting!" We all laughed.

Of course there's more, but I thought this toothpaste stories were so funny.

WHAT'S YOUR STORY. NOT NECESSARY TOOTHPASTE :-). HOW ABOUT YOUR OWN HABIT? HOW DO YOU SQUEEZE YOUR TOOTHPASTE?

With these kind of small stuffs that irritates the hell of our partners, I just thought that there would soon be a time when partners need to stand up and shout:

"This is me damn it! I look the way I look, think the way I think, feel the way I feel, love the way I love! I am a whole complex package. Take me... or leave me. Accept me - or walk away! Do not try to make me feel like less of a person, just because I don't fit your idea of who I should be and don't try to change me to fit your mold. If I need to change, I alone will make that decision. When you are strong enough to love yourself 100%, good and bad - you will be amazed at the wonderful life we'll shared."

DO YOU THINK IT'S POSSIBLE? TO TAKE HIM OR HER...ACCEPT HIM OR HER....FOR WHAT HE OR SHE IS?

What's the Meaning of Life? The feelings of highs & lows! The Cycle of Life!

Do any of you ever have this feeling where one moment you are up in the sky. And the next you are feeling 'kind of lost', 'listless'? The feeling that you are just living your life mundanely, routinely? The feeling that somehow you haven't done or achieve much in your lifetime? That life is so full of uncertainty?

That when you think of all the responsibilities you have on your shoulder, the many more years to come, it kind of scares you and depresses you. Because it's your responsibility to make sure it all turns out well. Would you not then have the thought to want to escape from all these? To just want to get away to a place that no one knows you, that you can just live life the way you want to live because there's no one that you know off to judge you?

It's easy to preach the Buddhism teaching, 'to just live for today', 'to not dwell in the past', 'to not worry about the future', 'to just be aware of the present moment'! But in reality we know that's not possible unless you are a nun or monk!



I have a good friend that just discovered she had cancer and she's only 40+, still single. She had given the best part of her life to her job. Now that she's recovering and having a good 2 months of MC, she just doesn’t know what to do with her time. She wanted to go back to work because that's her security. Without her routine of working from Monday to Friday, she's just kind of lost. Now she's trying to rediscover herself, discover her interests.

And as I sat here in this quiet evening, looking at the cars passing by, all either going back to their home, their family or going for their social events, as I think of all the hundreds, thousands of people that are doing the same, I wonder how are they feeling?

Have you all ever wonder about this cycle of life? Our children and their children and their children’s children and their children’s children’s children....will also experience what we are going through now. Is it really 'suffering' as Buddhism preaches?